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Genius is often described as the ability to see new paths, to advance a field in ways that transcend old, rigid definitions and lead us to a brave new world. In this regard, Kamala Harris' press corps deserves its due and due recognition.
That's why I believe the Harris Press Corps should win a Pulitzer Prize for their unique approach during this election cycle: not asking the candidate any questions about being president, but instead giving him a fun opportunity to talk about his deeper humanity.
Harris visits spice shop known for its anti-Republican sentiment, calls for end to 'division'
Just this weekend in Pittsburgh, we saw the power of this new journalism, as the newspapers' staid, and let's be honest, mostly white, reporters could have been paying attention to Hersh Goldberg-Polin, or Americans killed by Hamas, or this week's disappointing jobs report.
But instead, pay attention to this anecdote that a Washington Post writer wrote about X: “Kamala went to Penzey's Spice and bought Creamy Peppercorn Dressing Base, Fox Point Seasoning, Trinidad Lemon Garlic Marinade, Turkey Seasoning and Tuscan Sunset Salt-Free Italian Seasoning.”
U.S. Vice President and 2024 Democratic presidential candidate Kamala Harris greets people during a campaign rally at Penzey's Spices in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, on September 7, 2024. (Mandel Gunn/AFP via Getty Images)
Woodward and Bernstein should be proud.
Notice the progressive and welcome diversity in the candidates' spice racks: Do you think Donald “Big Mac” Trump could even tell the difference between Trinidad garlic marinade and turkey seasoning?
These are the issues on which Harris' press corps is laser-focused, not old-fashioned tidbits like economic policy. And look what the American electorate has already learned.
Tim Waltz loves “white guy” tacos, apple cider doughnuts, and pork chops on a skewer. Aspiring First Gentleman Doug Emhoff likes to eat a pretzel at night, which is actually a bit more than Kamala likes. That's the scoop!
Harris won't answer questions about domestic or foreign policy, but she loves Doritos, and thanks to her press corps, her recipe for Bathtub Collard Greens is available for anyone to make at home and judge for themselves. Now that's transparency!
But it's not just print journalists who are changing reporting for the better: “people” with cameras and microphones are breaking new ground with their own unique approach: they don't ask any questions, but pretend as if they're filming a Bat Mitzvah.
Vice President Kamala Harris speaks at a campaign event in Detroit, Michigan, USA, Monday, September 2, 2024. (Emily Elconin/Bloomberg via Getty Images)
Again in Penzeys, our intrepid video reporters captured a candid moment of Harris comforting an older white woman who was in tears for reasons no one could understand.
Imagine how rude it would have been at such an emotional moment to shout, “Mr. Vice President, when are you going to have your one-on-one interview?” or “Do you still believe in reparations?”
No, this new generation of journalists understands that American voters don't need to know the meaningless details of how Harris will govern. They need to get a feel for how real and powerful it will be.
Kamala Harris' media avoidance angers voters
There could be no more fitting accolade for these ink-stained heroes than a Pulitzer Prize — after all, that is what the New York Times and Washington Post won in 2018 for their false reporting of false Trump-Russia collusion.
Of course, the story itself is complete nonsense, but that doesn't matter: It has soured Trump's four years in office and comforted Hillary Clinton supporters who remain convinced that Trump cheated.
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The Harris Press Corps has found an even more sophisticated way to fulfill journalism's ultimate duty, which is, of course, to get Democrats elected.
There's no need to blur the truth, like with the Russia hoax or the Hunter Biden laptop denial, instead just veil the emotions and show us a movie montage of lovable “Mamalla” Harris and goofy Tim Waltz.
Mark what I say: this new form of journalism will be taught in re-education camps, i.e. journalism schools, for years, if not decades, to come.
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We are living through history: the end of the cold, hard journalism of the past that demands truthful answers, and a change to a warmer, softer news media that cloaks honesty in a soft quilt of ignorance.
It is for this steadfast dedication to helping obfuscate her politics that Kamala Harris' press corps deserves a Pulitzer, not just for all the tips, but also for reminding us that what really matters most is defeating Donald Trump.
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